Well, the family stuff has died down a bit. Thank God! My parents are supposedly "starting fresh," whatever that means and I think they're going to be selling some stuff to be able to pay my brother back some more money.
Isn't is nice when your parents try to do the right thing once in a while?
But I haven't been too stressed about it all. Nosiree! I tried a different strategy over the last two weeks for dealing with my family.
Nothing at all.
Yep. I didn't do a damn thing. When my brother first called me, I felt like I had to do something. Right now! I always react that way when my brother ambushes me. I don't know if it's the late hour of his calls or the urgency in his voice. Either way, he always gets me worked up.
But my husband recommended that I not do anything right away this time. He said that it really wouldn't make any difference and just because my brother drops a bomb in my lap every couple of months, it really isn't my problem.
My husband is a wise man.
So I let it lie. And you know what? The world didn't fall apart. My family figured things out for themselves-- sort of, and I didn't have to pull my hair out worrying about it.
I could get used to this.
I haven't heard from my mom in a couple of weeks, even though I asked her about selling some stuff for my brother. But he knows about it, so I'm not going to fret.
I'm going to learn how to chill out. And when my mom, or my brother, decide to get me all worked up again, I'm going to remind myself that they are in Thailand-- and too far away for me to do anything that can affect their situation in the near future.
Remind me of this when I get freaked out next time.
8 comments:
If you learn how to chill out when it come to parents can you let me in on the sceret?
It may not be a permanent condition, so I can't claim a cure. But ignoring my parents works wonders.
Easy to do when their half-way across the world though....
Excellent news! Sometimes, doing nothing can be the most powerful action. It's their mess, let them clean it up.
Puss
Alan Moore once said, (regarding his split with DC Comics) "When you find you're standing in a pile of shit, you don't jump up and down and yell at the shit, you just step out of the pile."
Good work.
Meanwhile, there's a ten-year meme waiting for you. Details on my blog!
Oh, I shall endeavor to remind you, if/when it happens again. Although all this makes for great reading, I don't envy you having to live it.
How you mananged to marry such a wise man, considering the family that raised you, I'll never figure out. I guess your natural smarts won out over childhood conditioning...
Puss
Yeah. I've been talking with my brother and things have calmed down quite a bit with no input from me. Yaaaa!
Steve
Gotta avoid the piles of shit. The meme will me my next post.
Jocelyn
I will look for the reminders. I think my hardheadedness got me through. My mom didn't want to like my husband but I told her she wasn't allowed to dislike him. Seriously. I told her that I knew there wasn't one legitimate reason not to like him and I wasn't going to hear any b.s. about him. That was the end of it.
One of my posts was about toxic parents and it is by far one of the most common topics that people Google and end up on my site.
Thought you might like to know that I've started posting Dismaying Stories again. Drop by if you get a chance.
Oh I totally agree! Sometimes you just gotta take a breath and let them do their thing.
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